Silly Smoke Sensors

17:07:45 - 17:20:00 = 12 minutes 15 seconds to silence the unbearable racquet that signalled yet another alleged fire.

Well, NSW Fire Brigade, you have let me down - a 2 minute and 15 second slump in response is nothing to be proud of I guess... Well neither is the fact that it takes longer for 1 vehicle to be mobilised compared to 2!

The main thing is that I took Sir AAA's advice and took some reading material with me and learnt something - reading whilst sub-conciously hearing a fire alarm going off counteract each other's comprehension

I rest my case...

-Adam

Beef Brew (not a stew!)

When drinking with your friends over the good ol' barbie get-together, do you ever think to look at your pooch's interest? - Well look no further, the Happy Tail Ale is for you (with a catchy name free of charge!).

Without stealing to much of the news from their new website, I will let my readers look for themselves: http://www.beerfordogs.com/ - non alcoholic and non carbonated... Beef flavoured (or for the vegetarian dog, which I have not met!, peanut butter flavoured)

Americans aren't as dumb as people claim them to be...

-Adam

Fake Fire alarm Fellonies

Fire alarm went off at 17:29 Wednesday 24 May (or at least according to my computer's clock). According to a recording of mine (a devised experiment simply waiting for the alarm to go off), it took 9 minutes 20 seconds for the Fire Brigade to switch the fire alarm off and 5 seconds after that to switch it back to the on position (although I am not focusing on their blunder tonight). The fire alarm had been going for approximately 30-35 seconds before I began recording meaning a total time of 10 minutes (give or take 10 seconds included) to arrive on scene when trustworthy 'whereis' believes that the journey itself takes 6 minutes - good/bad/normal time; what do you think?

It does also baffle me as to why sometimes the alarm goes off and 2 trucks arrive whereas on other occasions only 1 truck comes and on the select few instances a cherry picker makes its way to our College - just a guess really... so many false alarms the Fire Brigade might as well test out their vehicles in case there was a REAL fire.

Wow; it did entitle me to chuckle when the NSW Fire Brigade's domain is http://www.nswfb.nsw.gov.au/ - just for the extra 'nsw' geographic awareness!

A point detailing the wheris.com.au's credibility however: 1.52 km can be done in 2 minutes through a 50 km/h is definitely denying physics' credibility!

-Adam

Freeland's a Fake

Rather disappointed that upon several attempts to ascertain my soul's value, the same error was displayed on my laptop's screen. I understand the fact that the idea of selling your soul most probably was brought up by the cult-ural series The Simpsons whereby Millhouse (excuse spelling if it is incorrect; my knowledge of the addictive show is limited to say the least!) the 'point dexter' buys Bart's (I mean Brat) soul for a belittled sum of money. I am, thereby, admitting that I have been another 'suck in' patient of the organisation but if you would be so kind to inform me as to its purpose, I would be ever so gracious. Paying monthly/quarterly/annual fees for the domain etc. is a very efficient resource allocation but then again the shareholders of this so called business is deemed to be psychologists and lawyers of 'high stature' in...Society?

Humph I am startled whilst viewing "Culture Wars in Australia: A Hypothetical" on NBN at the same time - up late viewing is so much more educational than 'prime time' viewing until a) Big Brother Up-Late is shown to horny nocturnals; b) The 12:00am line is crossed and the pornographic ads shown every 2nd advertisement; and c) I fall asleep

-Adam

We want your soul. Your money, your debts...

Oh yere such a catchy song (no joke; love the bass!).

If someone would be so kind as to visit http://www.wewantyoursoul.com/quote.php and fill in the following for me (because my Univerisity's internet is somewhat filtered):

are you over 18 years of age? Yes

are you a practising Christian? Yes

Have you been baptised? Yes

Have you ever given money to charity? Yes

Have you ever given money to the homeless? Yes

Have you engaged in sex before marriage? No

Have you ever tried to contact the dead? No

Have you ever consulted a mystic, medium, tarot reader or similar? No

have you taken any of the following drugs? Heroin, Cocaine, Crack, LSD, PCP No

Do you smoke? No

are you a vegetarian? No

do you drink more than the recommended weekly intake of alcohol (30 units for males, 21 for females)? No

do you eat on a regular basis at any of the following food outlets: Macodnalds, KFC, Burger King, Pizza Hut, starbucks No

do you think that you are overweight? No

are you currently on a diet? No

do you indulge in autoerotic practises? Yes

have you ever owned vehicle with an engine capacity of 2.0 litres or greater? No

have you ever stolen anything of value? Yes

do you own a mobile phone? Yes

do you own goods made by the following manufacturers:nike, sony, nokia, apple, microsoft? Yes

have you ever been employed in any of the following occupations: estate/rental agent, advertising agency, car/life insurance company? No

have you ever worked for a major record company? No

do you read any of the following periodicals: Sun, Mail, Sport, Star, Mirror No

do you watch any of the following news channels: Fox, MSNBC, CNN, SKY No

are you member of blockbuster video? No

do you download music and media from internet? Yes

do you use internet chat rooms? Yes

do you still buy music on vinyl? No


ON THE NEXT PAGE, AFTER CLICKING NEXT:


I support the war on terrorism Neither


Voting is important so I never waste my vote Neither


I believe in flying saucers Neither


public demand drives consumerism Agree


the world is overpopulated Disagree


war is a necessary part of social evolution Neither


the minimum wage is a good idea Neither


books are an obsolete medium Disagree


capitalism is the future of our society Neither


homeless people generally bring it upon themselves Neither


most immigrants are only here to take our money Neither


AFTER ALL THIS CLICK PROCESS QUOTE AND GET BACK TO ME AS HOW MUCH MY PRECIOUS SOUL IS WORTH :)

-Adam

The Great Escape - Amputation

Long time no post; even forgot to insert a artiric remark in my title!

"So you'd cut his leg off but not help him [urinate/excrete]" to which afterwards the reporter chuckled - Tracy Grimshaw

Hmm appears to me being trapped 1 km below ground is a joke

With this said, Channel 9 still ceases to amaze me - On ya Eddie

-Adam

RF stands for Ritual Forgetting

Remembered to take door-card with me down to washing room
Trundled down 2 flights of stairs
Opened up 2 washing machines' lids
Removed all the contents of both washing machines
Stowed (as in the airline stowing!) contents in seperate areas so as to avoid mixing up belongings
Accidently drop card in washing machine
Remove card from washing machine
Put card somewhere
Forget where card was put
Searched in semi-washed clothes whilst in washing machine, no avail
Manage to get all the washing powder on my arm in process - cycle not complete
Search other peoples' clothes, no avail
Trundled up 2 flights of stairs with washing powder
Knocked on Resident Fellows (RFs) door
No response - Duty RF was in different block altogether
Trundled to Top D thinking it was Top B
Enquired as to the whereabouts of this "Haley"
Reply was "you are in Top D not Top B"
Trundled to Top B
Knock on Haley's door
Interrupted a 'Mothers Day' Mum phonecall
Tell her I had left card in room (to avoid embarrasment)
Trundled to my room
RF tried 2 cards; both of which were not the mastercard (excuse the pun)
3rd card succeeded in opening door
Come through doorway
Sit on commander seat
Visit http://www.blogspot.com
Click the corresponding "New Post" icon
Insert the above
Future: Will click "Publish Post"
Future: Will twiddle thumbs (so as to speak) for 40 minutes
Future: Will Trundle down 2 flights of stairs
Future: Will remove contents from both washing machines
Future: Will find card in process of doing the above
Future: Will endeavour to remember where card is placed
Future: Will endeavour not to post in this format

-Adam

Shock Horror...

Recently confirmed is the ground-breaking news of search engine hits;

Calamities & Ideologies, the phrase as a whole, is subject to many ambiguous and fallacious meanings however Google (TM) (R) (C)2006 has brokered a deal with my host Blogspot to bring joy to the world at last - The Number 1 URL displayed as having a match/relevance to a search enquiry calamities & Ideologies without the bunny ears.

Host and acclaimed author Adam Coombes had this to say after the startling news:
"I am glad"

Well those 3 words do mean a lot in the Blogspot Bugle and so with no further adue, I present thee with the Meaningless Merit Award; synonymous to the Careless Certificate of Charity. Congratulations Adam and do enjoy the e-Award.

In the meantime, stay true to your word and the Bugle might trumpet in your ears,

-Adam

Speechless...

It is official...

When one unsuspecting individual is to put into google's search area "Calamities & Ideologies" (with the quotation marks) he/she/it is only shown with one hit - my blooming (yes blogspot, my language has turned a corner :) ) blog

I dunno...

MMM New Oreo Wafer Sticks look apetizing at the time of posting

4/100 People surveyed on Family Feud would go on a first date to McDonald's - "Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, all on a sesame seed bun" has had some insetuous impact?

There is a Doritos Chips thief in my neighbourhood

'Blame deaths on the conditon(s) of highways/freeways' - Bullshit (I do understand that language will now result in the message being filtered)

The budget looks good for the ageing population and a $10 raise in families - the 'milkshake and sandwich' raise is continuing to propogate!

The following chronologically follows today's ACA (one of my favourite programs on Free-to-Air Television for daily humour)

$5... Not even enough for a pack of cigarettes - Referring to child support!!!!!!!!!!!

csafu2 and eBay - the Swimming Pool's business loophole (And I hope the last 3 characters aren't implying obscenities)
EDIT: The following email was received when I contacted this escapable e-identity as to his business operations - "have a look at my ebay store and think befor you email some one and get the full story not just 1/2 of a story" - well I did look at your store and my gosh the majority of products look so similar to what resembles a pool... Must be my optical sensory/perceptual system playing up because the word pool in the products unfortunately [for your sake] appears on such items... I am not sure what 1/2 of the story you are tuned into but it appears to me that you are talking about the 1/2 that is lies?!

-EDIT made possible by the one and only moderator, Adam

In 14 days $35k+ lost... West pack-your-bags-and-head-East

$1.05 for ATM PIN mis-input

Checkout Cheating - Scanners overcharge customers. Solution = Self-Checking Out? Well it has been trialled in Australia but was almost a parody... 'Checkout Chicks' were still required to verify signatures for credit card payments - Futile circle

Will endeavour to average a post every 2 days or more frequent from now on...

Broadening your appetitie and financial state,
-Adam

Sin Bin...(no, not a method of christian-wrongdoings' disposal)

The following will affect all those involved in/directly with [s]soccer[/s] football (html encoding is somewhat limited, those who know html 'well' will understand what the prior-coding means),

Should the-game-involving-primarily-kicking introduce a 'sin binning' system? My immediate thoughts would be yes (although I haven't heard the issue brought up anywhere - feel free to leave a message if you have). My philosophy behind a Sin Bin (in all sports) is for grounds of 'cooling down' - that is, for those involved to reconsider their thoughts etc. With said I would like to make it clear that currently Football's method of cooling down is found in the carding system whereby a Yellow Card is given for "cationable offenses"; but is a Yellow Card really a caution or a punishment itself? Coming from a qualified Level 3 Referee, I would like to say no and reform the laws

When one is to analyse the 'major' (yes, controversial term right there) sports, he/she/it would find that the 'Sin Binning' system is used in 'all bar one' - Football.

My current stance on Speeding v. Acceleration of motor-vehicles remains evident however won't be taken to the RTA temporarily as I have had my own problems with the law recently; however I am willing to take this issue further asap because of the very nature + affiliation I have with Football games every day that I MUST send-off players for something ultimately not worthy of a Red Card (contrary to the Laws of Football)

If there are any players/coaches/referees/public citizens that are for/against this issue, make yourself known as when I brought the issue up today with a colleague, their stance was an immediate 'yes, there should be Sin Binning' - the local radio station was broadcasting the controversial issue of Rugby League? whereby a player was 'sin binned' which sparked the thought at the time!

Opening and sparking thought in the local and worldwide community,
-Adam

Tardiness...

Titles are now starting to reveal the topics of my post - what is this coming to?

Meanwhile, I am sitting at my desk at the REFS Office - Regional Extended Family Services (the Admin Support/Call Centre Representative) - awaiting a caller. If you happen to be in the regional area in close proximity to Arm[pit]idale then don't hesitate to ring us on 6771 3638

Just to touch a philosophical debate, however, at this prime time, I would like it to be known that I am strongly against the use of pleasantries - i.e the over-used 'Sorry', 'Please', 'Thankyou' etc. - as they have a diminished meaning in today's societies. Correct me if I am wrong, but what is the use of saying sorry if it realistically has no meaning; wouldn't a deed/errand suffice?

Representing Armidale's and beyond thoughts,
-Adam

Sen...I mean Sam...Se(a)o

It was only recently Senseo came out with a revolutionary coffee pod system...When the name was then altered in todays news to Sam, I was quite shocked to say the least!

Sam Sao - Fake Officer (as he is known to Channel 10) has been fined over $8000 for impersonating a Police Officer claiming he has been recently promoted to Sergeant.

Now I am not sure what happens with this issue now that precedent has been laid, but there must be a line drawn between immaturity/morally wrong and that of Legally wrong - the matter has been somewhat distorted to the public due to a biased view regarding the issue and so my knowledge is limited to a large extent.

The quote Southern Cross Ten's Late News referred to was clrealy showing signs of intoxication - I can reasonably say someone has said the same (or largely similar) notion whilst in an altered state of mind however the issue would have been disregarded - making reference to being a "police officer" and wanting to "finish [his] drink".

Recidivisy is in question, I believe, and has been made public - the accumulation of fines was touched on by the reporter however only 2 occurences were discussed (both of which appear to even demise the Police Force!)

In summary, therefore, I would like to state that although the accused appears to have an altered state of mind in one or more of the occurences, he is not worthy of the fines - especially whilst taking into consideration his desires to join 'the Force'

Yours faithfully,
-Adam

1st year Law vs. Demanding = Opposities!

With the title said, I have no excuses for not putting effort into posting other than plain laziness/can't-be-botheredness

I don't think I have a big enough audience to be letting them down if I don't post so my lethargic self wins once again

To keep things on the useful side though, I might as well post the current poll statistics:

For: 4
Combination: 2
Against: 3

(With Pyschology telling me that an audience of at least 200 people is needed for effective results, my poll is not effective in the least!)

-Adam